Being Jew-ish is awesome

I love being Jew-ish. When it comes to religion, it can’t be beat. My dad’s family was Jewish, my mom’s family was some kind of Christian denomination. So what happens when these 2 decide to have kids? Well, it depends on whom you ask. Under Jewish law, the mother has to be Jewish for the kid to be Jewish. [...]

My Swayze will melt your face

So I went to the movies. I don’t do it very often, but every once in awhile a film says, “get your ass in here and watch me,” and I say, “Ahh yeahhh baby, I’m coming.”  The particular tantalizing flick that drew me out of my cocoon this time was “Terminator: Salvation.”
I am a sucker for [...]

WWEED: It’s a way of life

I do it every day when I wake up, at lunch, and when I get home from work.  It’s a personal choice, really.  It’s not hurting anyone. In fact, it’s a large reason why I approach my life in such a relaxed and calm manner.  It’s not for everyone, but some people need a little [...]

Aliens have more important things to worry about than your anus

I totally believe in aliens. In fact, I even believe that a lot of religious lore is founded in alien influenced, unexplained phenomena and let’s not forget the countless stories passed down from ancient civilizations that have claimed that their technology was handed to them from the heavens. Many Discovery and History Channel theologists have even suggested that [...]

You did what? And… you’re telling me about it?

So for those that don’t know this,  Apryls Antics is my sister. You’ll see a comment from her in every post (at least until now.)  Today I’d like to tell a story that contains a valuable life lesson. I’ll get right to it and we’ll work backwards:  If you fart a piece of spinach, keep it to yourself. 
Now [...]

Donald Trumps us all

So I’m watching the news last night (something I’ve been trying to quit doing) and there was a story about Miss California USA and her racy photos.  A few things trouble me about this. First, out of all the news I watched, this was the biggest story. Second, the incredible tardness of whats-her-face. Third, Donald Trump [...]

The Rock Oh Mama

See what I did there? There was no way I was going to name this post “Happy Mother’s Day” or ” I love you mom.”  Nope. This Mother’s Day, I’m giving her a cool nickname that rhymes with the President’s name, making it the most unique Mother’s day gift ever (take that, sis) and having nothing [...]

You want me to be a battery? Sure.

So I shaved my beard yesterday. It wasn’t my intention, I was trimming it and took out a gouge. So I tried to just go with the whole goatee and mustache thing, but as my goatee got smaller, the more French I looked. That being unacceptable, after years, the beard is gone. My chin got [...]

No, seriously

I won’t often share my life-shit here, but I’m so absorbed with it I can’t really focus on much else. The problem is, I can’t really talk about it openly here, either, so begins my clever way of airing my life-shit in a vague enough way that certain people won’t know what the hell I’m [...]